=(

[hazy_reflection]

John said we don't feel as close as we used to. He used me working as an excuse for it...that because I'm working we obviously don't spend as much time together so we're not doing as much together anymore...

Should I be worried about this...? Either way, it made me feel like a horrible wife, even though I know he didn't mean it that way, nor did he want to make me feel that way. But I still feel horrible about it.

Comments

[a-leprechaun.livejournal.com]

What's the context? Were you in the middle of a Serious Discussion, or was it more of an off-hand comment he made?

I wouldn't necessarily worry right off the bat. My John and I have times when we're really out of sync with our schedules, especially now since I'm working two jobs... and it might suck, and we might complain about it to each other, but it's not a question of blaming the other person. It just is what it is, and we do our best to find time to spend together.

[hazy-reflection.livejournal.com]

No context...just a completely out of the blue comment as he was drifting off to sleep. I dunno. I know it's nothing to worry about just because that's the way we are...but I'm a worrier by nature. *shrug*

Of course, a day later, his comment on it is that "it's summer!" We don't cuddle as much when it's warm because we're both larger people and it's just too hot and sticky and not in a good way. =P

[fyrestar1.livejournal.com]

I agree with a_leprechaun. It depends on context.

Is he implying that he wants you to quit? Does he want you to move your schedule somehow to match with his? Is he planning to change his schedule to line up with yours? Are you the only one working right now?

If I were you, I wouldn't feel horrible about it. Working is a fact of life. Sometimes two people work similar schedules, sometimes they don't. It sucks, but what does he expect? For you to quit working and just sit around waiting for him to get home?

[hazy-reflection.livejournal.com]

No he doesn't want anything to change as far as the job situation. It was just some weird off-hand comment that he uttered before falling asleep. We both like to cuddle... And today I apologised for being a complete hormonal fool--because let's face it, when I PMS I PMS BIG TIME--and we talked it over and I told him how I cried for over four hours because of it and how I actually went to "that place" in my thought processes of wondering if we did the right thing in getting married and all sorts of stupid bad thought places. He suspects the lack of cuddle is because of the heat. It's getting into summer weather, which means hot and sticky not of the good variety. Means a lot less cuddling and more shower sex but we're both cuddlers so *shrug* It'll change with the weather.

And eventually, I expect to sit around waiting for him to get home!! =P Cuz we'll be that rich that I can be a big fat lazy at home wife. =D

[honest-illusion.livejournal.com]

Why not talk to him about it? :) That way, you'll have a better understanding of his side and you two could start working things out. Based on my experience, when I let disturbing remarks like that slide, the conflicts just got worse because I didn't air them out when I should have.

[hazy-reflection.livejournal.com]

We talked. =) It was mostly my PMS talking at the time, and crying...and being ridiculously outrageous in my thought processes (see above) and of course the typical over reaction from a worrier like me. And he knows that and we cuddled and everything's better. I'm just a headcase. =P

[honest-illusion.livejournal.com]

Haha, glad to know it's all sorted. ;)