The Mystery of Me

I had a spark of inspiration for my novel!! Unfortunately it fizzled out far too quickly. I only got 1182 words written today, which brings my total up to 12281. I'm 11052 words short of the 23333 total.

Need to figure out what to DO! I really really want to be able to finish this one, or to at least get A LOT higher word count than I've ever done. I just...can't find the plot bunnies to do that with. This really does cement the fact that I was never meant to be a writer though...

There is a wicked mad thunderstorm passing over my house as I type... I'm talking crazy lightning--it's been almost nonstop for the past hour--some bass-tastic thunder and massive rain, raindrops the size of frickin' lemons man. The last crack of thunder, and I do mean CRACK of thunder, seriously almost made me pee my pants. If you're sensing de ja vu it's because I just posted that on my Facebook status as well. =P Yes, I'm that lame that I post something like that everywhere. What kind of crack of thunder you ask? You know the type that sounds like God's ripping open the universe? That seismic tear in the sky sound? Yeah. That kind of crack. It was freaking amazing. I don't think I've EVER heard thunder like that before.

So I'm just sitting here in my lounge room, in the the dark, watching the lightning illuminating the heavens, listening to the thunder scare the piss out of me and I gotta say I'm absolutely loving it. If I weren't so worried about getting sick I'd totally be out twirling in it instead of sitting here typing about it. And in case the power goes out, the candles are already lit with spares sitting nearby. Something to light the way if I can't see to light them? My handy dandy Nintendo DS within grabbing distance and of course, my cats to trip me regardless of whether there's light or not. =)

And yes, I'm using it as an excuse to procrastinate writing more on my NaNo project... =P

Victory!! Before the clock chimed 12 this very evening I defeated my daily NaNo requirements and hit 6667 words, one word more than the suggested goal for Day Four. I feel extremely accomplished. =)

Day 2 of NaNoWriMo 2011!! I have almost ALMOST reached the goal for day 2 and am way proud of myself because I think it's the first time that's happened EVER. It's 11:58pm and I'm sitting on 3143 words of my novel. I really like the chances for this one. =)

Odd thing happened today... John's family is...typical, I guess. His older brother had a falling out with the family a while back and they haven't spoken to him for a while. James is, however, getting married on October 15th and as much as he doesn't like to admit it he's very much connected to his family and would love them to be in attendance. His fiancee, Amy, is at odds with the family as well in that she gets extremely defensive when something doesn't go the way she wants it. She fights with everyone, including the family going as far as calling John's mother (who is also her FIANCEE'S mother) a bitch because she commented that Amy and James didn't go to visit James's 4-year-old daughter Tanisha in the hospital when she got her tonsils and adenoids removed. Anyway, they haven't talked to the family for months and then out of the blue the other day they decide to show up and just make nice. Because they want mummy dearest to make their wedding cake.

And then they show up at the parental house tonight just to "hang". Talk about awkward. And they finally gave an invitation to John and I for the wedding. John was saying he wasn't going to the wedding until receiving an invitation. Now he's obligated to go.

I really don't know what to think about James. He's a nice guy and underneath it all he really wants to be close to his family. But when he's around his fiancee and friends he's the biggest asshole on the face of the planet and his family is what's holding him back and his parents are the reason he has any problems. And then there's his daughter who was born to an ex girlfriend who he was cheating WITH on his then previous girlfriend at the time. He stopped going out with daughter's mum and started dating Amy and then they were engaged a while back and then they broke it off. At that time he told Amy he asked her to marry him because he wanted to see what she'd say. This time they're seeing it through. The kicker? They have NO MONEY to be getting married, aren't getting any personal loans, James owes John over $7k and part of that $7k+ was the money needed to pay for the engagement ring.


I love my husband and I love his family most of the time... but at this point in my life I'm having a really hard time with it all...